First I'd like to start by celebrating the beginning of what I'm hopeful will be a blog focused on the development, deepening, and growth of men.
Over the recent years I've spent a huge amount of time reading about, studying, and talking with men about the things that take away their energy, leave them wanting, and frustrate them.
There are so many things to discuss here but for the sake of this quick intro, I wanted to give you some stats and some themes that we'll be covering. Find the study here.
66% of young men feel that nobody really knows them.
Almost 30% of younger men reported not spending time with someone outside their household in the past week.
40% of all men show depressive symptoms.
44% of all men had thoughts of suicide in the prior two weeks
Nearly half of men (48%) say their online lives are more engaging and rewarding than their offline lives.
Only 22% of men have three or more people in their local area they feel close to or depend on.
More of the youngest men trust online misogynist influencer Andrew Tate (20%) than trust Biden (15%) (in 2021).
Proportion of deaths by suicide in the US that are men: 4 in 5
▪ Six in ten men visit porn sites at least weekly.
These are greatly troubling facts. Go ahead. Take a few breaths, stop, pause, and re-read it. Get into the study. Put yourself in the uncomfortable position to reflect on this. I certainly had to do this many times in coming to terms with the absolute brutality that all of this is true.
The startling and provocative statement of comedian Chris Rock is poking to one of the underlying problems:
“Only women, children, and dogs are loved unconditionally. A man is only loved under the condition that he provides something.”
The above only references one of the many challenges facing men in today's society.
Some key takeaways:
1. Men are struggling with meaning and purpose
2. Men are deeply lonely
3. Men are unable to resolve their internal turmoil and fall into depression
4. Men are resorting to manufactured connection rather than authenticity
5. There is tremendous pressure on men to perform in a certain way
All of these personal problems within men spill over into the wider collective and create immense problems within the fabric of a society.
We see this especially clear in the way that men engage in intimate connections which will be a major piece of what we will try to uncover and heal within men through this offering.
Men that have not healed themselves, have no contact with consciousness, who don't respect themselves, and who don't go to war for their own depth cannot offer this to the world, to their wife/partner, or to society. We are seeing immense breakdowns due to this across the globe.
Still there is more to discover about the why but in the effort to keep it brief for now, i'll begin to wrap it up here. We are committing to pushing into the unchartered and frankly, terrifying process of helping men to look deeply within.
We want to focus on key words and themes that I believe have the power to secure men and anchor them in truth which can then cause order and stability to come to the world outside of them.
The core of this is called Presence. Consciousness. Being like a tree. Being rooted. Anchored. Stable. Secure. Able to deal with weight. Able to hold. Able to be there. Not running. Not escaping. Fully engaged.
This is the journey that we are beginning. I'm thankful and encouraged that you stopped by to take a look, to read through this and to hopefully join for this journey into more fullness and abundance not only for yourself but for the world around you.
In the words of Gandalf to Theoden King:
Too long have you sat in the shadows.
Take a few minutes to ask yourself if you have even felt some of the things expressed in the study. Perhaps you are in that place now. Perhaps you have a story to share about that time in your life. What emotions arise when you read the stats? Do you know anyone that is feeling these things? Do you feel that there is hope? Do you feel cynical? Do you know where to begin? What are some things that you've done to help promote positive when you are feeling negative emotions about yourself or the state of the world? How can you engage in a practical way today and tomorrow to promote strength and vulnerability for yourself and your circle?
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